TheCourtRose

Fool How else do you learn about desire, except to choose and choose again? Follow the blazing fire igniting the depths of murky waters Even if it burns, singes, stings and fizzles out, at least then you will know Curiosity will not erode your skin, the sound of what ifs won't flutter and flux inside your lungs Raging to escape, coloring all your words and deeds with hunger Fall into the flames, over and over and over Let them call you crazy Let them yell from their cold and quiet corners Let them laugh and jeer, and shake their heavy heads In the reflecting waters only jagged teeth and hesitation will shine back upon them Choose the flames, choose the fire Until it consumes you whole, until it no longer burns, until you no longer want its warmth at all Only then will it truly be over

Late night Sidewalk and shadows A heavy blue moon swinging above Alone and the wondering of you and me Neither one saying "we" these days We disintegrated or finally exhaled that long, swollen sigh The moon puffed out its breath Deflated, a balloon sinking to earth The way we softly let go of each other again We were a once, a falling slowly blue moon love Neither bad nor good Not intended to endure (They say blue is the color of healing, the moon a guardian of hearts) If there had to be a story of us, it was a complete one But now the sky is empty and I stand alone Moon in hand Shadows on the sidewalk cast from stars Grasping at our story But it slips away from me, strands of ribboned moonlight sliding through my fingers like warm milk I cannot truly catch it, or hold fast to it (You cannot quantify the light of a blue moon) One deep breath for you- releasing a balloon back into a starlit sky My heart is quiet now that I let ...

Burnt cardboard lingers in the air Soaking wet ash and carbon swept down the drain in reddened handfuls No one will look to find a funeral pyre in the kitchen sink So much tied to such a little thing A binding that never truly belonged Flames devour acrylic peeling back layers of life All to reveal underneath a very quiet story So in the darkened rooms with only the slight smell of memory Scorch marks are wiped away from the sink Nothing left but a lingering Soon to be dispelled by morning air and light

In 2 days it would've been 8 years together but 7 months and 26 days ago we hit the 1 year mark of breaking I added it up one night 7 different kisses I shared with someone else and I would trade every one Not for more time, not for more love but for you to believe me when I say I'm sorry I'm sorry for the 3 times I broke up with you without the backbone to make it stick For the countless times I evaded and dodged, each one building into a lie For every okay I mumbled, when I was far from fine with you For the 1,349.3 miles I moved, from there to here because at 23 years old I was running away from home For every time I didn't believe you when you said I was pretty and each  man I found to prove myself wrong For the 1 glistening knife I put in your back after we broke up because the depth of my insecurity can justify almost anything For those key moments when I chose surrender instead of fight, never completely insisting you be the man I neede...